16 Comments
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M. Paula Coelho's avatar

This was such a beautiful piece. I loved the way you described the moment that she received her sight. And the fox’s wise voice. I don’t know if you’ve ever read “The Little Prince” but it reminded me of the fox who becomes his friend.

Jenifer Jorgenson's avatar

I've read it! And I'll definitely take that as a compliment. Thank you!

J.A. Evans's avatar

I'm sorry I'm so late on this. I think this is the best yet in the series. I love the direction this is heading. It feels like it will fit in my Golden Owl mythos. Not trying to usurp it or anything.

Jenifer Jorgenson's avatar

I'm really glad you liked it. The big picture is finally starting to take shape for me, which I guess means it will start to take shape for everyone else...

J.A. Evans's avatar

It feels rather witchy at this point. I’m liking it.

Amanda Izzo's avatar

“In that moment, I realized everything I had experienced before was just a dream, but now I was finally awake.”

Chills. Visceral chills from here to the last line. I don’t know how you do it. You weave together deeply moving stories that feel mythical and magical that still lay bare what it means to be human.

Jenifer Jorgenson's avatar

That's a truly wonderful compliment. Thank you.

Spencer D.W.'s avatar

This is super cool. I reads like an ancient folk tale or myth, and the idea of threads makes me think of the weave in D&D. super dope.

feedback wise I think the dialog is a bit weak, feeling more like things I've heard before rather than deepening the world around me, if that makes sense. And that very last bit that explains what the fox is probably wasn't needed, or if it is something you want to keep i would make it even more vague. I feel like that something like the fox should never truly be nailed down to a description.

A banger for sure! I'll have to check out the others in the anthology.

Jeremy Baker's avatar

I absolutely love this.

I love the premise and the execution. The capitalization on 'saw and 'heard let me know it was special, the weight of the word magnified by simple mechanics. I love the universe you built with all the... inbetweeness? My only question, where is this place that generations had met the fox?

Jenifer Jorgenson's avatar

Thank you. I'm really glad you enjoyed it.

This was the latest in an anthology of stories about the fox (and what's beyond or behind the fox). I'm still building the whole backstory, adding to it with each story. Keep an eye out and you may learn the answers to your questions in future stories!

Whimsy & Woe's avatar

You've told me that before, but that doesn't account for the skill that goes into it. Too little information and your audience might get bored. Too much and you give the game away. You always keep me on the edge of my seat. Right where I want to be.

Jenifer Jorgenson's avatar

Okay, that is one of the nicest things anyone's ever said about my writing. Thank you.

Whimsy & Woe's avatar

I was so excited to see this pop up, but it was worth the wait.

What always impresses me with these stories is how you built a giant mystery in the first one and then trickle out the answers a little at a time in each consecutive one. Never too much, never too little. I don't think I could hug that line. Well done my friend.

Jenifer Jorgenson's avatar

Thank you. I can honestly say it's because when I start I have no idea what the end result will be, so I'm figuring it out as I go.

Jenifer Jorgenson's avatar

This is so helpful! Thank you for taking the time to share your feedback. I'll go take another look at the dialog with this in mind.

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Sep 18, 2025
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Jenifer Jorgenson's avatar

Thank you for leaving this comment. Really.

I find your writing so magical, so having you say something like this really means a lot.